First off all i'd like to list a few things we should all be boycotting:
Wal-Mart. They take business from good quality businesses and then give you junk that falls apart when you plug it in.
Star-Kist Tuna. Nancy Pelosi, with all her great qualities, has taken advantage of her station and made regulations that gives Star-Kist (her husband's business, and a foreign one at that that does not pay U.S. taxes) a huge benefit over American tuna companies.
Starbucks. You shouldn't be drinking coffee ;)
State Liqour Stores. You shouldn't be drinking alcohol. Even if you need the antioxidants.
Ford Motor Company. Apparently they stole the window wiper idea from some inventor and didn't want to give him credit. They also, because they had more influence and money, beat out the steam engine car. We could be running on water today if that hadn't happened!
Jiffy Peabut Butter. It's just not as good as Adam's Peanut Butter. (this is a registered fact ;). Ask Chris.
I am also now going to boycott (or why can't it be girlcott?) writing in this blog until at least five people sign up as followers. We are creaing a cult here and we need followers for it to work. So, we are great... fine and dandy and we would love to MSN you with our webcam...
Until then, You will hear from us again once you sign up. (Thanks in advance ;) especially to Lizz cause she already signed up).
Hasta la Vista.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Saturday, May 16, 2009
April Showers Bring May Flowers
So May has been a month filled with flowers. At least our house has been filled with flowers. I got Chris some lilies at the beginning of the month and then she added some purple lilacs from the neighborhood lilac tree.
(It isn't in anyone's yard so it's flowers are for everyone!)
Then just last night we went late at night and raided another lilac tree, this one is in front of an abandoned building so they aren't getting appreciated enough. We actually are doing those vain flowers a favor by covering our house with them ;).
I have been getting Chris flowers for many reasons, and because she is just awesome. Did you know that she was taking three classes while working full time this semester! I barely made it with one... so she's cool and the coolest part.... she did great in all of those classes! I am so stinking proud of her!
So the next time you see Chris, don't feel bad, she's just smarter than you and that's okay. Just accept it ;).
(It isn't in anyone's yard so it's flowers are for everyone!)
Then just last night we went late at night and raided another lilac tree, this one is in front of an abandoned building so they aren't getting appreciated enough. We actually are doing those vain flowers a favor by covering our house with them ;).
I have been getting Chris flowers for many reasons, and because she is just awesome. Did you know that she was taking three classes while working full time this semester! I barely made it with one... so she's cool and the coolest part.... she did great in all of those classes! I am so stinking proud of her!
So the next time you see Chris, don't feel bad, she's just smarter than you and that's okay. Just accept it ;).
Monday, April 13, 2009
...And the Bunny Lays the Eggs?
Easter has got to be a chickens favorite holiday. They lay eggs daily, sometimes when the workers trick them into an 18 hour day they lay more... what a hard life! So I'm impressed that they figured out a way that once a year they get some bunny to lay all thier eggs for them. Women should learn something from the chickens, make the guys have the babies once a year. Course then the babies would probably end up in shells for a few weeks and hatch into lizards or something... It sure wouldn't be chocolate goodies...
So we have had a great weekend. Easter was so fun. Chris' parents and us went to Delta, watched movies, ate tons of food, rode the 4 wheelers while we watched the insane mayhem of people down at the Little Sahara
(Easter seems to be a huge hit there now, we've thought about selling navajo tacos there next year to make bank...), and we played some baseball! It was really fun but I think we are all sore today from hitting the ball so much. I was suprised at myself that once I wasn't as afraid that I was going to line drive the ball at Chris or Carl, I was hitting okay. I've never been able to hit baseballs before, ask Ty, my friend since childhood that always tried to teach me, but my strike zone seemed to only be above my head....
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
We're All April Fools
So this has been a traumatic and funny day... and Isn't that what it's all about?
So first off all, When I got up to go to work, everyone else had already gone, I discovered that Gigi was gone!
I searched the house and cupboards fifteen times. Then I searched all the neighborhood and no Gigi! I was panicking so I finally told Chris. i went to her work to tell her and after i did, she started laughing. I thought, why is she laughing about Gigi being gone? And then she said, "Good April Fools, Davie..." But I wasn't joking. I spent five minutes trying to convince her i wasn't kidding when she finally had to go home and check for herself. She called and said, "Davie, Gigi's gone!" And I thought, no you get it. Nothing bad should ever happen on April 1st cause no one believes it!
Then later I get a picture text of a positive Pregnancy test from Chris. I just said, you'd better not be joking because I can't handle all these emotions all at once....
Well, i was about 80% sure she was kidding, but that 20% can really get to you... so I thought of a plan. If she was kidding then I'd get her back, and if she wasn't then i would get bonus points.... So I took her flowers and a mommy-to-be card to her work and let everyone there know how happy I was to be a Daddy! Turns out she used a red marker for the Prego Test... and I got her back cause all her coworkers were worried that I'd be mad... but that's not me, I don't get mad, I get even...
Then with the blessing of technology I sent out a facebook message saying that Chris was pregnant, and my family freaked! They were all so excited it almost hurt to tell them the truth. Then they said "You're sick. Funny, but sick..."
So to end the day, I went home, dreading not finding Gigi, when as I got to the house I saw a flicker of movement behind our porch chair. I checked under the flaps, dreading that I was just imagining things, when there He was! Gigi was okay! I took him inside, and after a long snowy day outside, he ate and wanted ten minutes of petting time.
Anyways, Happy April "Do-Something-You've-Always-Wanted-to-Do-But-Don't-Want-To-Get-In-Trouble-For-It" Day!
So first off all, When I got up to go to work, everyone else had already gone, I discovered that Gigi was gone!
I searched the house and cupboards fifteen times. Then I searched all the neighborhood and no Gigi! I was panicking so I finally told Chris. i went to her work to tell her and after i did, she started laughing. I thought, why is she laughing about Gigi being gone? And then she said, "Good April Fools, Davie..." But I wasn't joking. I spent five minutes trying to convince her i wasn't kidding when she finally had to go home and check for herself. She called and said, "Davie, Gigi's gone!" And I thought, no you get it. Nothing bad should ever happen on April 1st cause no one believes it!
Then later I get a picture text of a positive Pregnancy test from Chris. I just said, you'd better not be joking because I can't handle all these emotions all at once....
Well, i was about 80% sure she was kidding, but that 20% can really get to you... so I thought of a plan. If she was kidding then I'd get her back, and if she wasn't then i would get bonus points.... So I took her flowers and a mommy-to-be card to her work and let everyone there know how happy I was to be a Daddy! Turns out she used a red marker for the Prego Test... and I got her back cause all her coworkers were worried that I'd be mad... but that's not me, I don't get mad, I get even...
Then with the blessing of technology I sent out a facebook message saying that Chris was pregnant, and my family freaked! They were all so excited it almost hurt to tell them the truth. Then they said "You're sick. Funny, but sick..."
So to end the day, I went home, dreading not finding Gigi, when as I got to the house I saw a flicker of movement behind our porch chair. I checked under the flaps, dreading that I was just imagining things, when there He was! Gigi was okay! I took him inside, and after a long snowy day outside, he ate and wanted ten minutes of petting time.
Anyways, Happy April "Do-Something-You've-Always-Wanted-to-Do-But-Don't-Want-To-Get-In-Trouble-For-It" Day!
Monday, March 23, 2009
My Hotel Room
So I just wanted to let you all know, Chris rocks this world! She told me a while back she wanted to faux paint our gray plaid box room. (And this is what it looked like)
I knew she could do it, but even I was awed at how amazing she did it.
She should go into the business with this. Can you believe this is the first time she's done it?
I knew she could do it, but even I was awed at how amazing she did it.
She should go into the business with this. Can you believe this is the first time she's done it?
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The Magical Kingdom
This is a Princess story from Chris' Princess party put together by all the guests present. Each * means a new person is writing, without knowing what story has come before their part...
Magical Kingdom
Princess Chris was so sick of her magical kingdom. Living in a place of crystal balls and evil sorcerors sounds pretty exciting and all, but not when you have to fix all their messes day in and day out.She decided she had enough...
*
She found herself so frustrated that she began pacing back and forth. Huffing and Puffing. But never yelling or screaming. Of course not. She was a Princess after all. By pacing so much she began wearing out her golden shoes. The golden shoes had been given to her by Countess Von Ukendock and her friend Kyli...
*
The golden shoes were similar to the guy who drank Red Bull. The golden shoes gave her Wiings. The magical kingdom was suddenly under attack by the evil Keebler elves. They had burned down the tree and were setting fire to everything! The only thing she could do was put on her magical shoes and fly to give word to other people... and firefighters. Out of the corner of her eye she found one. The one who would save everyone!...
*
He was Lord Farquad! (Princess Fiona just wasn't his type) Yes, to everyone else he was a little on the short side, but so was she!! She knew at once she must meet this amazing man. When she walked up to him the first thing she said was...
*
"Why haven't you texted me in the last five minuets? I wanted to ask you if you like blue berry flavored bubble gum?" The Prince told the princess that she was too controlling and needed to chill. Suddenly it become a very surreal moment in which the two passionately fell in love and kissed....
*
Now the Prince and the princess where confused as to what would happen next when suddenly the fashion designer boasted of his glamorous tights. At last the source of the magic had been unveiled. Who knew that such power could come from the britches of a fashion savvy lad...
*
But these britches made everything so magical. While dancing the night away with the beautiful princess, things began forming around them. While her dress swayed out and sprouted flowers from the ground. Who knew that not only his britches were powerful but her dress was spectacular and magical...
*
And everyone knows that with powerful britches and a spectacular and magical dress, one could take over the world! So they went galloping on their noble steeds into the sunset and enjoyed the rest of their powerful lives together.
THE END
Magical Kingdom
Princess Chris was so sick of her magical kingdom. Living in a place of crystal balls and evil sorcerors sounds pretty exciting and all, but not when you have to fix all their messes day in and day out.She decided she had enough...
*
She found herself so frustrated that she began pacing back and forth. Huffing and Puffing. But never yelling or screaming. Of course not. She was a Princess after all. By pacing so much she began wearing out her golden shoes. The golden shoes had been given to her by Countess Von Ukendock and her friend Kyli...
*
The golden shoes were similar to the guy who drank Red Bull. The golden shoes gave her Wiings. The magical kingdom was suddenly under attack by the evil Keebler elves. They had burned down the tree and were setting fire to everything! The only thing she could do was put on her magical shoes and fly to give word to other people... and firefighters. Out of the corner of her eye she found one. The one who would save everyone!...
*
He was Lord Farquad! (Princess Fiona just wasn't his type) Yes, to everyone else he was a little on the short side, but so was she!! She knew at once she must meet this amazing man. When she walked up to him the first thing she said was...
*
"Why haven't you texted me in the last five minuets? I wanted to ask you if you like blue berry flavored bubble gum?" The Prince told the princess that she was too controlling and needed to chill. Suddenly it become a very surreal moment in which the two passionately fell in love and kissed....
*
Now the Prince and the princess where confused as to what would happen next when suddenly the fashion designer boasted of his glamorous tights. At last the source of the magic had been unveiled. Who knew that such power could come from the britches of a fashion savvy lad...
*
But these britches made everything so magical. While dancing the night away with the beautiful princess, things began forming around them. While her dress swayed out and sprouted flowers from the ground. Who knew that not only his britches were powerful but her dress was spectacular and magical...
*
And everyone knows that with powerful britches and a spectacular and magical dress, one could take over the world! So they went galloping on their noble steeds into the sunset and enjoyed the rest of their powerful lives together.
THE END
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Our Anniversary and a Little Kitty named GiGi
So we made it to the Big Number Two! I knew we would but it seems like time has shot by us. I feel like it was just months ago that I was dating this gorgeous and sweet girl I'd met online... but that was close to three years ago now... wow!
I love to hear this, and it makes me proud to hear people still say this, but "we are the cutest couple around." And honey, I know we always will be... I hope it doesn't make people mad that we aren't sharing that title... don't hate me because my wife is beauiful,okay?
So since we've made it a sort of tradition to share our honeymoon/anniversary with someone else (i.e. :honeymoon in Hawaii with Davie's Parents, 1st Anniversary with Chris' parents...) we made sure that we spent a few days with Chris' parents and then fish dinner with our neighbors. Which both were a blast. Chris' parents took us out on thier pontoon boat all day and we went fishing (and caught a bunch of 12-14 inchers!), sun bathing, and they even BBQ-ed a steak dinner all on the boat ride. It was like a special dinner boat for our anniversary! So nice guys!
Then we stayed at the Anniversary Inn in Logan. It's a lot nicer than the one in Salt Lake but the drive to Logan is not much fun. Thank goodness we had Edward and Bella to listen to on the way there...
We stayed in the Aphroite's Court, which was pretty cool and Chris and I have decided we need to model our room so that there is a jacuzzi in it that you can watch T.V. from.
Someday.... (and Chris did something awesome... she already started remodeling our room. She faux painted it and it looks so Cool! She did such a good job and it was here first time ever doing it like that... I am awed!)
I did something awesome too... I know, it's a new thing for me, but I gave Chris two years ago a pair of white gold rose earrings that she fell in love with. They were really heavy and one tragic day, one of them disappeared. Well, I found a guy to make a copy and he did an awesome job! Well, I presented them to her and she probably would have cried but she kept her composure. She looks so beautiful...
Then we came home to our new roomate, GiGi.
Now GiGi is our kitty who we rescued from the Grantsville Pound. He's a nut but he can be real sweet. Anyways, he's exactly what Chris wanted... and my goal in life is to make sure she always gets exactly what she wants.
Well, poor GiGi was a boy when we bought him, then we thought he was a girl and he became Princess GiGi, well, then the vet told us that She was a Boy, and now he is Prince GiGi. Anyways, he's had a hard time finding his identity, but I'm proud to say, he's found himself. He's also found that I can't stand it when he runs around the house in the middle of the night, so that's exactly what he does... and I get mad, but then he comes and cuddles up and I have to forgive him.. Anyways, I never thought I'd get a cat, I don't really like them, but here I am, Davie, and I'm a Cat Owner.
I love to hear this, and it makes me proud to hear people still say this, but "we are the cutest couple around." And honey, I know we always will be... I hope it doesn't make people mad that we aren't sharing that title... don't hate me because my wife is beauiful,okay?
So since we've made it a sort of tradition to share our honeymoon/anniversary with someone else (i.e. :honeymoon in Hawaii with Davie's Parents, 1st Anniversary with Chris' parents...) we made sure that we spent a few days with Chris' parents and then fish dinner with our neighbors. Which both were a blast. Chris' parents took us out on thier pontoon boat all day and we went fishing (and caught a bunch of 12-14 inchers!), sun bathing, and they even BBQ-ed a steak dinner all on the boat ride. It was like a special dinner boat for our anniversary! So nice guys!
Then we stayed at the Anniversary Inn in Logan. It's a lot nicer than the one in Salt Lake but the drive to Logan is not much fun. Thank goodness we had Edward and Bella to listen to on the way there...
We stayed in the Aphroite's Court, which was pretty cool and Chris and I have decided we need to model our room so that there is a jacuzzi in it that you can watch T.V. from.
Someday.... (and Chris did something awesome... she already started remodeling our room. She faux painted it and it looks so Cool! She did such a good job and it was here first time ever doing it like that... I am awed!)
I did something awesome too... I know, it's a new thing for me, but I gave Chris two years ago a pair of white gold rose earrings that she fell in love with. They were really heavy and one tragic day, one of them disappeared. Well, I found a guy to make a copy and he did an awesome job! Well, I presented them to her and she probably would have cried but she kept her composure. She looks so beautiful...
Then we came home to our new roomate, GiGi.
Now GiGi is our kitty who we rescued from the Grantsville Pound. He's a nut but he can be real sweet. Anyways, he's exactly what Chris wanted... and my goal in life is to make sure she always gets exactly what she wants.
Well, poor GiGi was a boy when we bought him, then we thought he was a girl and he became Princess GiGi, well, then the vet told us that She was a Boy, and now he is Prince GiGi. Anyways, he's had a hard time finding his identity, but I'm proud to say, he's found himself. He's also found that I can't stand it when he runs around the house in the middle of the night, so that's exactly what he does... and I get mad, but then he comes and cuddles up and I have to forgive him.. Anyways, I never thought I'd get a cat, I don't really like them, but here I am, Davie, and I'm a Cat Owner.
Monday, March 9, 2009
EVA the Robot
So we had a teen activity at the library were I work, and we took apart a whole bunch of broken electronics to see what was inside.
Then I challenged them to put it back together. This proved to be a bit more difficult. Then we made a robot with the parts. They wanted her to be WALL-E but She's a girl cause she's Pink. So then she was named EVA.
I think she's great. And she'll clean your floor for you if you want.
Then I challenged them to put it back together. This proved to be a bit more difficult. Then we made a robot with the parts. They wanted her to be WALL-E but She's a girl cause she's Pink. So then she was named EVA.
I think she's great. And she'll clean your floor for you if you want.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
"The Greatest Party Ever"
Those words are taken from a friend of ours, Brad, who came to Chris' B-Day Party. He actually said, "Dear Diary, I just went to the greatest Party ever!" Yea, it really was that cool!
We had some awesome Games, like Princess Charades and The Princess Relay. And don't forget the Wicked Witches Curses!
The food was just great, all provided for by Colonel Sanders, KFC! The cake was even better... And Chris made it herself!!!
And then we had everyone help out to write our own funny princess stories... which will be added shortly...
Then we all were presented to the crowd as Lords, Ladies, and of Course, Princess Chris.
The party looked awesome,
tasted awesome,
and with all our best friends there, was awesome!
We had some awesome Games, like Princess Charades and The Princess Relay. And don't forget the Wicked Witches Curses!
The food was just great, all provided for by Colonel Sanders, KFC! The cake was even better... And Chris made it herself!!!
And then we had everyone help out to write our own funny princess stories... which will be added shortly...
Then we all were presented to the crowd as Lords, Ladies, and of Course, Princess Chris.
The party looked awesome,
tasted awesome,
and with all our best friends there, was awesome!
Friday, February 27, 2009
I Really Am a Princess! Chris' Birthday
So that is the title of a very cute book you should all read. it's about a girl who is sure that her real parents are Kings and Queens and they would soon come and give her everything she wanted, including letting her have a pony that lives in her room...
Anyways, Today is Chris' Birthday!!!!!
One of my favorite days in the world because I get to spoil the one I love till she can't take anymore!
we are having a Princess Party for her tomorrow and everyone is invited to dress up in formal gowns and suits... and yes, even the guys are excited about this! We are gonna have fun games and good food (from the Colonel Sanders himself!) I can't say enough how very excited I am to do this. Chris is a real Princess, and she deserves this chance to show her. I don't know anyone with a sweeter heart and a more giving soul. And she's gorgeous too, so once Disney writes her story into a movie, Cinderella will have to step down and Princess Chris will take stage as the best Princess of them All!!!
I gave her a present this morning that came in a princess castle bag... inside were all the Princess essentials: a pretty necklace, hair stuff, a Magic Red Apple, and Chocolate Pudding! Yeah, I covered all the angles! I don't know who is having more fun with all this... me or Chris.....
Anyways, Today is Chris' Birthday!!!!!
One of my favorite days in the world because I get to spoil the one I love till she can't take anymore!
we are having a Princess Party for her tomorrow and everyone is invited to dress up in formal gowns and suits... and yes, even the guys are excited about this! We are gonna have fun games and good food (from the Colonel Sanders himself!) I can't say enough how very excited I am to do this. Chris is a real Princess, and she deserves this chance to show her. I don't know anyone with a sweeter heart and a more giving soul. And she's gorgeous too, so once Disney writes her story into a movie, Cinderella will have to step down and Princess Chris will take stage as the best Princess of them All!!!
I gave her a present this morning that came in a princess castle bag... inside were all the Princess essentials: a pretty necklace, hair stuff, a Magic Red Apple, and Chocolate Pudding! Yeah, I covered all the angles! I don't know who is having more fun with all this... me or Chris.....
Monday, February 23, 2009
Horton Hears a What?
Everyone, Meet Katie, such a cute cuddly animal with sweet adorable eyes... who knew she'd make Chris and I laugh so hard? She is the new owner of my all-timne favorite movie quote, "In my world everyone is a pony and the drink rainbows and poop butterflies" ha ha ha! I love this!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJkaKAIl_Fc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJkaKAIl_Fc
Friday, February 13, 2009
Katy Perry and Other Fruity Things
So Chris asked me a while ago to pick between Katy Perry concert and Brittney Spears concert. It was very easy for me to pick, so on Tuesday, February 12, we went and saw Katy Perry!
It was actually way fun, especailly to see so many gay guys cheering and singing along to her songs... to be fair, not all of them were gay. I sang to a few...
We had a lot of fun, Katy Perry is nuts. She had huge blow up fruits all over the stage, but the encore when she came out in a leopard leotard and a blow-up-stick of cherry chapstick... that she wanted everyone to kiss... hilarious really.
My favorite part of the night, as always, was Chris. She is so gosh darn gorgeous! She went to get a drink for us and all the guys were hitting on her. I felt jealous and proud at the same time. She is such a babe!
And to top it off, yesterday night she did the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me. She made me a fruit basket bouquet. It was all great fruit cut in heart shapes and dipped in white and milk chocolate. I ate so much of it I had to stop myself or I'd end up sick! It was so awesome and tasty! Chris could do anything she wants, but one thing would definately be an artistic chef.
It was actually way fun, especailly to see so many gay guys cheering and singing along to her songs... to be fair, not all of them were gay. I sang to a few...
We had a lot of fun, Katy Perry is nuts. She had huge blow up fruits all over the stage, but the encore when she came out in a leopard leotard and a blow-up-stick of cherry chapstick... that she wanted everyone to kiss... hilarious really.
My favorite part of the night, as always, was Chris. She is so gosh darn gorgeous! She went to get a drink for us and all the guys were hitting on her. I felt jealous and proud at the same time. She is such a babe!
And to top it off, yesterday night she did the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me. She made me a fruit basket bouquet. It was all great fruit cut in heart shapes and dipped in white and milk chocolate. I ate so much of it I had to stop myself or I'd end up sick! It was so awesome and tasty! Chris could do anything she wants, but one thing would definately be an artistic chef.
Valentine's Day Jokes
This is mainly for Carl and Nancy, since they aren't going to get to hear my holiday joke song this time. Just imagine the jokes set to music....
Why do valentines have hearts on them?
Because spleens would look pretty gross!
What did one light bulb say to the other?
“I love you a whole watt!”
Why didn’t Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer’s heart?
Because even Cupid can’t hit a target that small!
"A: Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
B: Sure, they're very scent-imental! "
"A: Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?
B: Because it's all heart."
"A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, man standing at the counter placing "Love" stamps on red envelopes with hearts all over them. Then he takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying all over them.
The boy goes up to the man and asks him what he is doing. The man says,
"I'm sending out 2,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
But why?" asks the boy.
I'm a divorce lawyer, "the man said"
"What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?"
"A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a golden ring for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?"
You'll know tonight." he answered
That evening, the man came home with a small box and gave it to his wife. She opened it and find a book entitled "The meaning of dreams".
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
Groucho Marx.
What did one oar say to the other?
"Can I interest you in a little row-mance?"
What do you get when you kiss a dragon?
Third degree burns!
Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank?
It was a case of guppy love.
What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!
What did the painter say to her boyfriend?
"I love you with all my art!"
What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse?
"I've got a crutch on you!"
Q: What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day?
A: Hogs and Kisses!
Q: What did Frankenstein say to his girlfriend?
A: “Be my valenstein!”
Girl: “I can’t be your valentine for medical reasons.”
Boy: “Really?”
Girl: “Yeah, you make me sick!”
Q: What do you call a very small valentine?
A: A valentiny!
What would you get if you crossed a dog
with a valentine card?
A card that says, “I love you drool-ly!”
What did the paper clip say to the magnet on Valentine’s Day?
“I find you very attractive.”
Q: What did one melon say to the other melon on Valentines day?
A: It’s a pity we cantaloupe.
Q:What did the mushroom say to her Valentine's date?
A:He's a fungi
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a
candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky
to get a card
“A Redneck Valentine”
Yore hair is like cornsilk,
A-flapping in the breeze,
Softer than Blue's,
And without all them fleas.
Why do valentines have hearts on them?
Because spleens would look pretty gross!
What did one light bulb say to the other?
“I love you a whole watt!”
Why didn’t Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer’s heart?
Because even Cupid can’t hit a target that small!
"A: Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?
B: Sure, they're very scent-imental! "
"A: Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?
B: Because it's all heart."
"A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, man standing at the counter placing "Love" stamps on red envelopes with hearts all over them. Then he takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying all over them.
The boy goes up to the man and asks him what he is doing. The man says,
"I'm sending out 2,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
But why?" asks the boy.
I'm a divorce lawyer, "the man said"
"What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?"
"A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a golden ring for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?"
You'll know tonight." he answered
That evening, the man came home with a small box and gave it to his wife. She opened it and find a book entitled "The meaning of dreams".
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
Groucho Marx.
What did one oar say to the other?
"Can I interest you in a little row-mance?"
What do you get when you kiss a dragon?
Third degree burns!
Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank?
It was a case of guppy love.
What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!
What did the painter say to her boyfriend?
"I love you with all my art!"
What did the man with the broken leg say to his nurse?
"I've got a crutch on you!"
Q: What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day?
A: Hogs and Kisses!
Q: What did Frankenstein say to his girlfriend?
A: “Be my valenstein!”
Girl: “I can’t be your valentine for medical reasons.”
Boy: “Really?”
Girl: “Yeah, you make me sick!”
Q: What do you call a very small valentine?
A: A valentiny!
What would you get if you crossed a dog
with a valentine card?
A card that says, “I love you drool-ly!”
What did the paper clip say to the magnet on Valentine’s Day?
“I find you very attractive.”
Q: What did one melon say to the other melon on Valentines day?
A: It’s a pity we cantaloupe.
Q:What did the mushroom say to her Valentine's date?
A:He's a fungi
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a
candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky
to get a card
“A Redneck Valentine”
Yore hair is like cornsilk,
A-flapping in the breeze,
Softer than Blue's,
And without all them fleas.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
My Little Asian Chef
So Chris has many talents. She showed off one of them the other day by making this amazing Chineses Vegtable Soup and fried rice. It tasted just like the soup that we had bought at this nice Chinese Restaurant, Chopsticks. I was impressed, it was sooo good. It was a great late night dinner.
Now I'm trying to make it up to her by getting a sweet Valentines together... we'll see if I can impress her as much as she always impresses me... We'll just have to see.
Now I'm trying to make it up to her by getting a sweet Valentines together... we'll see if I can impress her as much as she always impresses me... We'll just have to see.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Vegas, Baby!
So we spent the weekend in the City of SIN. And I haven't had so much fun on a vacation in a long time!
So last Monday Chris and I realized we had the weekend off together and it was a 3 day weekend, and whadya think we did, shouted "Vegas Baby!" Well, actually not quite like that but then we called up Carl and Nancy and asked what they were doing... "Well, we have a three day weekend too, Vegas?"
And so we all gathered early Saturday morning and drove to Vegas to be at the swap meet by 9 AM. We actually got there almost right on time, which is a big deal, and we got straight to work finding a place to park in this overly crowded swap meet. Nancy jumped out and stood in a spot right by the entrance (which we had every place place went went) and as we pulled around to get in a Hispanic guy tried to run her over. She held her ground and he said "I know what you're doing Lady" in his Hispanic accent. We used that phrase hundreds of times the entire trip. Amazing how many ways you can use it... well, we bought cool stuff, Wii games and a SawzzzzzzzAll ;). I'm already addicted to one of the games...
After that we went to our hotel Sahara (and we got to stay in our very own room for only $38 a night!).
That night we went out on the town... and oh boy did we have fun! We took the Monorail all over... to Paris, and then Treasure Island.
Which the show is not pretty much a strip tease...
and then over to the Mirage to see the Volcano...
And then we walked over to the Bellagio and saw the 24 ft Chocolate Fountain....
And the Awesome Garden Conservatory....
And then we saw the Bellagio Fountains, and check out the view! Is there anything more magical than this?
We slept in the next day as Chris' parents visited a timeshare for us all and got us great tickets! Way Cool you guys! That night we saw the Variety Show that they got tickets for and a free buffet. The show was so great! It had everything from comedians, to magicians, to contortionists, to Hispanics! What a deal! We all loved it. And then afterwards we went to Fremont Street.
It was soo cool! Chris and I got to be interviewed on the "big screen" that spans the street! Who else has got to do that?!
Then we saw a tummbler show...
And then three guys jumped on thier motocross bikes and cruized inside a globe cage together. I don't think Chris has every been more scared for someones life before...
The best part of all was when they turned the lights off and put the nightly show up on the cieling. It was a tribute to Queen and Carl sang along with all his heart, "We Will, We Will, Rock You!"
The next day, Monday, we wandered around the MGM theaters and found this cool dealio moving projected picture on the ground that reacts when you step on it. With bubbles and sparkles flying everywhere around my feet, I could have played on it for hours! Then we saw the lion exhibit and you can actually walk under the lions as they sleep inches from your head.
Then we drove on home, finding that we missed Salt Lake and Delta. We stopped in Mesquite to buffet again, but Mesquite is not so cool, so onward to St. George. And to be honest, Utah buffets beat anything Vegas had to offer. It was Lucky Buffet and the Ribs were sooo great!
We're home now and I love it, but Chris and I are already planning another three vacations this year. I mean, hey, life is short, We're gonna spend the money so why not spend it on something that we'll remember for the rest of our lives?
So last Monday Chris and I realized we had the weekend off together and it was a 3 day weekend, and whadya think we did, shouted "Vegas Baby!" Well, actually not quite like that but then we called up Carl and Nancy and asked what they were doing... "Well, we have a three day weekend too, Vegas?"
And so we all gathered early Saturday morning and drove to Vegas to be at the swap meet by 9 AM. We actually got there almost right on time, which is a big deal, and we got straight to work finding a place to park in this overly crowded swap meet. Nancy jumped out and stood in a spot right by the entrance (which we had every place place went went) and as we pulled around to get in a Hispanic guy tried to run her over. She held her ground and he said "I know what you're doing Lady" in his Hispanic accent. We used that phrase hundreds of times the entire trip. Amazing how many ways you can use it... well, we bought cool stuff, Wii games and a SawzzzzzzzAll ;). I'm already addicted to one of the games...
After that we went to our hotel Sahara (and we got to stay in our very own room for only $38 a night!).
That night we went out on the town... and oh boy did we have fun! We took the Monorail all over... to Paris, and then Treasure Island.
Which the show is not pretty much a strip tease...
and then over to the Mirage to see the Volcano...
And then we walked over to the Bellagio and saw the 24 ft Chocolate Fountain....
And the Awesome Garden Conservatory....
And then we saw the Bellagio Fountains, and check out the view! Is there anything more magical than this?
We slept in the next day as Chris' parents visited a timeshare for us all and got us great tickets! Way Cool you guys! That night we saw the Variety Show that they got tickets for and a free buffet. The show was so great! It had everything from comedians, to magicians, to contortionists, to Hispanics! What a deal! We all loved it. And then afterwards we went to Fremont Street.
It was soo cool! Chris and I got to be interviewed on the "big screen" that spans the street! Who else has got to do that?!
Then we saw a tummbler show...
And then three guys jumped on thier motocross bikes and cruized inside a globe cage together. I don't think Chris has every been more scared for someones life before...
The best part of all was when they turned the lights off and put the nightly show up on the cieling. It was a tribute to Queen and Carl sang along with all his heart, "We Will, We Will, Rock You!"
The next day, Monday, we wandered around the MGM theaters and found this cool dealio moving projected picture on the ground that reacts when you step on it. With bubbles and sparkles flying everywhere around my feet, I could have played on it for hours! Then we saw the lion exhibit and you can actually walk under the lions as they sleep inches from your head.
Then we drove on home, finding that we missed Salt Lake and Delta. We stopped in Mesquite to buffet again, but Mesquite is not so cool, so onward to St. George. And to be honest, Utah buffets beat anything Vegas had to offer. It was Lucky Buffet and the Ribs were sooo great!
We're home now and I love it, but Chris and I are already planning another three vacations this year. I mean, hey, life is short, We're gonna spend the money so why not spend it on something that we'll remember for the rest of our lives?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)